Just when you thought the anxiety is over, it comes back right after your fantastic holiday together! Oh, the thank-you notes! There might be hundreds that you need to send and you might find yourself worrying about wording and making mistakes.
We are here to help! Here are the top thank-you notes mistakes you should avoid:
Getting your guests’ names wrong.
If you don’t know the guest very well and the name on the wedding gift card isn’t clear, check your invitations masterlist or contact someone in the family who can possibly provide the correct spelling of your guest’s name.
Forgetting to mention the kids.
If your wedding gift came from a family with children, list the names of the children in your thank-you note. If their gift card does not include the children’s names (some will just write “and family”) – phone a family member or a friend of yours for the information and accurate spellings. Its a little thing that can make your thank-you note feel extra heartfelt.
Writing the same, generic messages.
Don’t just write “Thank you for your generous gift”. It sounds like something out of a greeting card. Instead, write a personalised note by telling your guest how you love the particular gift (include the name of the gift), how you’ll use it or if it was your favorite on the registry. Your guests will be delighted by a well-thought out message.
Mentioning the amount of the cash gift.
Your guest may have been very generous, but don’t gush about the value in your thank-you note. Instead, tell them how grateful you are for their support and how lovely it was to spend time with them at your big day. Share with them how you will use the cash (for your honeymoon, or for your new home), however, if you will be using their gift to pay some of your credit card debts, keep it to yourself. Your guests will love to hear that they’ve helped you make your dream come true – not to have helped you dig out of a hole.
Forgetting that your guest wasn’t there at the wedding.
Some of your guests may not have made it to the wedding but have sent you gifts instead. When you write your thank-yous, do not lose focus and make the mistake of thanking them for their presence when they actually weren’t there. Check the card for any hints like “ we wish we could’ve been there” etc.). If there isn’t any, ask your partner or check with family members if the guest was at the wedding or not. If it is still unclear, you can skip the “presence” part and just thank them for their gift.
Forgetting the plus ones.
Address your thank-you notes to both guests. If you were not able to find out their guest’s name, do a little research – check the wedding card that came with their gift or call up your guest to ask for the correct spelling of their date’s name. They’ll be happy to receive the co-addressed message from you.
Typing your thank-yous on the computer.
It may be acceptable to print your thank-you notes, but make sure you leave room for handwriting your message. Remember, personal touch is the best etiquette – it shows your guests that you took the time to write them a message.
Sending your thank-yous too late.
Don’t wait 10 months to send your thank-you notes! Your guests will appreciate a speedy response. Aim to send out your notes within two weeks after the bridal shower and within three months after your wedding day.
Using electronic thank-you notes.
The graphics may be cute, it may be easy to come up with a message and mass email it to your guest but these e-mailed thank-yous may land in the junk/spam folder. Do not take the easy way out! Your guests have devoted their time to your wedding, so devoting a few nights to write your thank-yous will be a lovely gesture of your gratitude.
Not including both of your names!
Our very own managing director still dies of embarrassment thinking of some of the thank-you notes she sent out signed “Donna and …” She’d handed it over to her husband and he forgot to write his name (perhaps the Rugby was on TV!) and he just put the card in the envelope! Fortunately it only happened on a couple of notes but ten years on it is still a running joke amongst their friends!!!